Machine learning. Big data. Algorithms. Artificial Intelligence. These are just some of the topics that are (correctly) occupying our attention these days. But where do we humans fit into all of this? What is, and where is, the important “human moment”?
Daniel Goleman made famous the term Emotional Intelligence by his book of the same name. He also has a much-watched TED video on the subject of compassion (above). Below is the money quote from his presentation as it relates to the human moment (his use of the term “BlackBerry” indicates that this video is a few years old):
“The Harvard Business Review recently had an article called ‘The Human Moment,’ about how to make real contact with a person at work: … The fundamental thing you have to do is turn off your BlackBerry, close your laptop, end your daydream and pay full attention to the person.”
Now let me tell you a real-life story of a human moment I heard of from a close friend that mirrors Goleman’s human moment point perfectly.
I had been responsible for business and corporate development for an analytics software company HQ’d in Mountain View CA in the early 2000’s. My primary focus was to get a deep relationship established with IBM, which we were eventually able to do in the form of IBM’s acquisition of our private company.
This kicked off a whirlwind of new interactions for all of us as we had to integrate our team into one part of the gigantic IBM. As many of us interacted with IBM leaders for the first time, we noticed one thing: they were unbelievably distracted. A typical one-on-one meeting with a new IBM colleague frequently saw them constantly tapping and responding to instant messages on their phones (BlackBerries!) and laptops. This included first time meetings with an employee’s new manager.
One of my colleagues, John, told me of a meeting he had with an IBM executive named Karen. As he entered the conference room to meet with Karen, she was – like everyone else at IBM – furiously tapping away on her laptop. If this were like every other meeting John had experienced with someone at IBM Karen would give John partial attention while she kept her eye on her laptop and occasionally responded to a message.
But that’s not what she did. As he sat down, Karen closed her laptop, swiveled her chair toward him, and devoted 100% of her attention on their meeting. It was an opportunity for a “human moment”, and Karen took advantage. The reason why it made such an impression on me is because it was so rare.
Your job: be human. People remember when you’re authentic and engaged. One of the greatest signs of respect we can pay to someone is to listen to them.
Good luck!